Hello Fitness Nuts,
This year was a very interesting year at Fitness Nut Enterprises. Thank you all who have supported the Fitness Nut House and have stayed loyal to your fitness and nutrition programs.
Here are the 2010 FITNESS NUT AWARDS
Strangest Laugh……………………………………… Laura Coughlin
Best Day Time Moon……………………………… Todd Cesca
Best at Embarrassing Daryl…………………… Danika Whitehouse
Best Guns for a Female over 40 …………………… Jan Auger
Best Guns for a Female Under 40………………. Susie Kane
Cutest Baby Girl……………………………….. Faith Conant (I might be a little Bias on this award)
Best Online Client………………………………. Scott Duletzke
Tightest Hamstrings….. Tie: Tim, Kenny, Danika, Brian, Michele
Best Style……………………………Joanne Lapoint
The Sweatest Human Being On the Planet….. Brian Powell
Greatest Dane………….Dagmar Sullivan
Most Missed Danish Member…Dagmar Sullivan
Can’t wait to see again member…. Dagmar Sullivan
Best Smile……………………Wendy Thompson
Best Tenderloin…………….Ken Mason
Best Sled Bitcher……….. Rick Wolf
Best Goatee…………………Rick Wolf
Biggest Jet’s Bastard………RIck Wolf
America’s Most Wanted…..Bobby Lee
Best International Online Client(s)…………..Karl Crook and Laura Clay
Longest Tenure Client (female)………………. Michele Davis
Longest Tenure Client (male)………………… Jeff Bonney
Best at Operating The Rabbit……………….. I Think They Know Who They Are
Luckiest Bastard Alive………………….. Ken Mason
Living The Dream…………………………Ken Mason
Best Guns for Male over 40…………………Wayne Desper
Best Guns for Male under 40……………………. Dave Wagoner
Best Shoes……………..Chris Vaughan
Biggest Son of Bitch………………………… Doug Spurling
The Best Person To Torment in Class….. Brian Powell
Mother with the Children With The BestHair….. Lana Wescott
Nicest Hands………………….Wendy Thompson (Ivan made me)
The Smoothest With the Ladies…………. Robert “River Dance”
Loudest Duo……………………………………. Mark and Jack
Best Workout Top……………….. Da Hooch
Wildest Hair…………………………………….. Bobby Lee
Best Tattoos…………………………………… Bob Domine
Still The Luckiest Bastard Alive………………… Ken Mason
Best Shake Weight Performance………………… Ken Mason
Best Glutes (female)………………. This is a tough one, there are so many but I would have to say everyone who takes my classes have the best &#$es:)
Best Glutes (male)…… GROSS!!!
Napolean’s Best Man……..Dennis Thayer
Blindest Member……….. Pat Clark
Most Flexible…….. Vicki Drigotas
Most Likely to open up the Penis Enlargement Spam Email…. Brian Powell
Best Golf Performance…………………………..Scott Stallings
Nicest Legs……………………. Jan Auger (she worked hard for this award this year).
Best Wife………………………………………. Joy Conant
Hairiest Male…………….. The Dude Who Shaved In The Men’s Room who never cleaned up his mess….
Best Romantic Duo……………. Brian and Kim
Best Mini-van Performance………….. Brian Powell
Loudest Burp after a class………………… Jen
Best at Debating Should He live In Maine or Colorado……….. Jim
Best in a Wife Beater Tank Top………………………………..Jim
The Most Interesting Nickname………………………Jimmy Cupcakes
Best “Clothes Packer”…………………….. Stacy Gile
One Funny Bastard……………………….. Jeff Bonney
Best Spinning Instructor…………………… Danika Whitehouse
Biggest Hands……………………………….. Doug Spurling
Biggest Feet………………………………… Doug Spurling
Most Obnoxious Yankee Fan……………… Ed Karotko
Best Triceps…………..Walter Smith
Best Looking………………………………That’s easy, My Wife JoJo.
Fartiest Dog……………………………………. My dog Bogey
Most Neurotic Dog……………………. My dog Finn
Cutest Boys…………………………… Perrin and Avery Conant
Most Pregnant……………………….. Maggie Sinclair
Ricco Sauve……………………………. Mole
Best Hair…………………………… Jan Auger
Biggest Lush…………………All of those that do Strider class
Best Workout Tank Top………………….. Nikki Bonjourno
Greatest Covet of Nikki’s Tank Top…………………. Megan King
Nicest Guy in The World………………………. Andy Vail
Guy Least Likely to Date Your Daughter……………… The Dude Who Shaves His Entire Chest In the Mens room and doesn’t clean it up.
The Most Sleep Deprived……………………… Joy Conant
Greatest To Stall at Getting Into The Next Exercise………Meridith Rogers, Jan Auger is a close second
Most Committed To Classes……………… Deb Kinney
Greatest Singer……………………….. Jenny Comeau
Best at The Taiwon Plank Position………………… Tim Good
Best Antique Shop………. Cory Daniels
Most Mixed Matched Attire Wearer…………..Lydia Phillips
Most Southern Draw……………… Lydia Phillips
Most Generous and Well Liked………… Ron Smith
Best Painter……………………… Wendy Good
Best Couple……………………..Diane and Ed Stone
Best Face Expression During an Exercise Class……………. Jenny Comeau, and Pat
Most Likely to Watch an Infomercial on Hair Club for Men… Tim Good and Jon Burns
Most Likely to Try the Shake Weight at Home in Private….. Todd Cesca, Jeff Troiano, Brian Powell
Best Looking Instructor……………….. Danika Whitehouse
The Sexiest Instructor……………………. Peter Raymond
The Best BaDonkADonk………………….. Lee Talevi
Best Dance Moves……………………….. Danika Whitehouse
Best Mother Daughter Combo……………… Cheryl and Rachel Magalski
Most Wine Consumed in a Year…………………. Meredith Rogers
Most Likely to Be President of AA…………… Meredith Rogers
Best Adam Lambert Impersonation………… Michele Davis
Best Head Bob During Sprint on Strider…. Kimberly Meserve
Best Tan in Winter………………………… Nikki Bonjourno and The Hooch
One of the Nicest People In The World………………. Carla Kennedy-Janes
The Most Missed……………………… Lauren Kipp
Best Guns Over 50……………………Pat Clark
Best Farm Couple……………………..Joan and Burt Cowgill
Civil War Veteran…………………….Dennis Thayer
Best Gum Chewer……………………Saaaaaaannnnnnnndddddyyyyyyyyy
Loudest Male IN Fitness Nut History…… Craig Hutchins
Best Herbologist………………….Craig Hutchins
Worst Toes………………………. Craig Hutchins
Best Next Door Neighbor…… Steve Jacobsen
Newest Most Dedicated Member…….. Jim
French Revolution Veteran……. Dennis Thayer
Best Name for the Day Before Christmas and New Years…. EVVVVVVEEEEEEEEEEE
The Most Improved………………… Robert Berkeley
The Supplier of The Happiest Music Collection on an Ipod.. Cynthia Domine
The Greatest DAVY JONES dance Performance………… Yours Truly!! Me… It was a once and only performance.
Still the Luckiest Bastard……………….. Ken Mason
Hung Like A Horse……………….. A guy named Greg
Longest Car Running………………….. Again, yours truly. 18 hours to be exact. oh yea.
The Best Clothes Change in the Hallway………………….. Tie: Todd Cesca and Jeff Troiano
Most inconsiderate……………………. The dude in the bathroom
The Lost 13th Apostle………………. Dennis Thayer
Most Magnificant Femurs…………. Cynthia Domine
Best Slumber……. Daryl locking himself out of the house and ending up sleeping in the Durango for the night.
Best Abs………………… Susie Kane and Teri Thompson
Best Pilatiator…………..Deb Talmalge
Best Car on the Planet…….. Beef’s Shelby 500. My stang came in a close second.
Best at Strider…………………. Stephanie, and Rick Dempsey
Best in Show…………………. Christ Angelos
Greatest Front Desk Employee and Day Care Attendant in Fitness Nut History… Susan LeBlanc
Newest Employee… Walter Smith
Best Oreo Consumption During a Patriots Game…. Walter Smith
Nicest Mother of Triplets…… Maria Merriam
Best Maine Accent…. She’s Wicked Pissah….Patti Graham
Best Maintenance Man…………Dickie Graham and Bob Ney
Best James Taylor Look-a-like….. Bob Ney
Most reliable on the Same Treadmill Everyday…. Earl Slobada
Greatest Political Forum…. Dick, George, Earl, Jon
Most Serious…………………… Peter Gagnon
Favorite High School Teacher………….. Mr. Paquin
Best Eyebrows…………………………… George Lambert
Best at Measuring the amount of snow………… Blake Baldwin
Best Facebook Client………………………. Tim Revels
Best Eeyore Impersonation……. BIG GEORGE
Most Likely to Go To Dunkin Donuts After Working Out…. My Senior Fit Class
The Best Female Exercise Impersonator………….. Michael (Michele) Meserve
The Most Likely To Lift More Weight Than Tim Good…… Wendy Good
The most likely to do more sit ups than Tim Good…………… Wendy Good
The most likely to annoy Tim Good……..Wendy Good
Best Lying Down Position in Ab Class…. THE SAAAANNNNNNNDDDDYYYYY
The Freakiest Looking Guy………………………… The Frankenstein looking dude that came in thinking about joining up. But I didn’t have enough weight for him to lift, so he didn’t join. The dude was so freaky looking that he couldn’t even turn his head. Steroids does a body good, NOT!
Best Butt Slap During and Exercise Class……………. Lee Talevi
Still the Luckiest Bastard Alive…………….Ken Mason
The Best Member………………… All of You Fitness Nuts……
Well there you have it, this year’s Fitness Nut House Awards.
Daryl Conant, M.Ed